Posted by David Post:
Patent Humor:
http://volokh.com/archives/archive_2008_04_13-2008_04_19.shtml#1208354998
So when Monster Cable Corp. sent a cease-and-desist letter to Blue
Jeans Cable, Inc., alleging that the latter's "Tartan" brand cables
infringed various patents belonging to Monster, they may have bitten
off more than they can chew. Tuns out that Kurt Denke, President of
Blue Jeans, was a lawyer in a former life, and [1]the reply that he
sent back to Monster makes for some pretty interesting reading.
After graduating from the University of Pennsylvania Law School in
1985, I spent nineteen years in litigation practice, with a focus
upon federal litigation involving large damages and complex issues.
My first seven years were spent primarily on the defense side,
where I developed an intense frustration with insurance carriers
who would settle meritless claims for nuisance value when the
better long-term view would have been to fight against vexatious
litigation as a matter of principle. In plaintiffs' practice,
likewise, I was always a strong advocate of standing upon principle
and taking cases all the way to judgment, even when substantial
offers of settlement were on the table. I am "uncompromising" in
the most literal sense of the word. If Monster Cable proceeds with
litigation against me I will pursue the same merits-driven
approach; I do not compromise with bullies and I would rather spend
fifty thousand dollars on defense than give you a dollar of
unmerited settlement funds. As for signing a licensing agreement
for intellectual property which I have not infringed: that will not
happen, under any circumstances, whether it makes economic sense or
not.
And speaking of patent humor: If any of you happen to find yourself in
Philadelphia on Friday [STEPHEN COLBERT, TAKE NOTE!!] I'm going to be
[2]playing over at Doc Watson's bar (11th betw Locust and Walnut) at a
Temple Law School "Happy Hour," (5-7 PM), and will present the WORLD
PREMIERE PERFORMANCE of "Francis Barnes' Underwear," surely the
greatest (because the only) rock and roll song based upon a 19th
century patent law case from the Supreme Court. (As you patent
aficianados might have guess from the title, the song explicates
Egbert v. Lippmann, 104 US 333 (1881), a case holding that an
inventor's placement of a single corset-spring into his girlfriend's
corset constituted a "public use" of the new spring design). Come on
down!
References
1. http://www.audioholics.com/news/industry-news/blue-jeans-strikes-back
2. http://www.myspace.com/davidgpost